A Year of Transition

This year was a transition for my daughter, Gabby. Moving from the small schoolhouse of Wainscott, in which she spent 4 years, to the overwhelmingly large school of John Marshall had its many up and downs. She was petrified to leave Wainscott. She must have cried every day for at least a week before school started this past September. It was heartbreaking. She was afraid of the larger school, even though she knew many of the children there already. The familiarity, comfort and family-like love she felt at Wainscott — she was so afraid of losing. I, too, was afraid for her, she spent 4 years in this “idealistic bubble”, if you will. She did soon become happy at John Marshall and began to thrive as well as she had before. She remained friends with the friends she left in Wainscott with and the friends she already had known from various extracurricular activities, and she made many more good friends. She continued with her swimming and her dancing. She fell in love with her teacher and got to know the fabulous vice principal and nurse at John Marshall very well (she’s always at the nurse’s office, haha) but she soon also discovered the very many different personalities, values and morals of many different children. She had a very hard time understanding how people just weren’t “nice”. Don’t get me wrong she had had a quarrel or two with her friends during her time spent at Wainscott, but issues between the children were always resolved quickly and usually between themselves, and without tears or confusion and frustration. Friends have disagreements, they make up and move on. In Gabby’s mind everyone is her friend and everyone should be friends and her trying to comprehend the fact that was not how it was anymore. Us trying to explain to her that the real world just isn’t always like that was extremely difficult. It still is. A lot of it she took very personally, as if she were not a good person, and it knocked her down quite a few times. Gabby was born with a good heart — both of our kids were. I definitely think the values and morals Elisha and I have tried to instill, both our children have stuck with them. But as nervous as I was about the Wainscott School being so small, too family-like, and just so easy, I believe, at least for Gabby it was the best way to spend her early years. That “idealistic bubble” as I call it, we all want that. And her being able to have experienced that, I believe has helped her to know better and to want better. She wants so much for everyone to be happy, to be friends, and to just be nice. We have explained to her that sadly it won’t always be like that but it’s something I see her striving for, wanting for herself and everyone else. Just recently she came to me saying she wished she could go back to Wainscott. And, frankly, sometimes I don’t blame her. Life was simpler then. It’s so hard to see your child hurting and knowing there really isn’t anything you can do, except listen and guide them the best way you can, and hope that they remember what’s in their heart and what you have taught them.